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Wednesday, December 31, 2014

MY 2014: FEW THINGS THAT TRANSPIRED IN 2014

I BELIEVE WE GET THE YEAR THAT WE DESERVE. AND I THINK WITH THE WAY I'VE DEALT WITH LIFE SO FAR, I GOT WHAT IS JUST RIGHT FOR ME: ALL THE HARDSHIPS, FOODTRIP AND LAUGHTRIP. 

SOCIAL NETWORK STATUS

I ENJOYED INSTAGRAM JUST THIS YEAR BECAUSE MY PREVIOUS PHONES DINT ALLOW ME TO INSTALL THE APP. THIS YEAR, OBVIOUSLY I GET TO ENJOY IG ON A KINDA ODD LEVEL. 

HERE ON BLOGGER HOWEVER, POSTS INCREASED ONLY A LITTLE THAN LAST YEAR's. WHILE ON FACEBOOK AND IG, I STILL KEEP ON LIKING POSTS AS I SCROLL DOWN. I CLICK 'LIKE' BEFORE I ACTUALLY SEE THE PHOTO, WHICH IM TRYIN TO AVOID NOW. ON TWITTER, POSTS ARE A BIT FILTERED WHATEVER THAT MEANS. LOL. TUMBLR AND GOOGLE + ARE BOTH DOWNDATED. AND I NEVER PLURKED. 

I AINT CHINESE

I NEVER ACTUALLY DIGGED INTO THE INTERNET OR ANY CHINESE HOROSCOPE MAGAZINES TO KNOW WHAT 2015 HAS IN STORE FOR ME. BUT JUST AS I AVOIDED LEARNING ABOUT IT, HERE's MAMA WARNING ME TO KEEP AN EYE ON MY HEALTH AS SHE SAYS SHE READ ABOUT IT. THERE, I JUST GOT MY ANNUAL DOZE OF FENG SHUI. 

SO I BECAME AWARE OF IT, AND I CANT PUT IT OUT OF MY MIND COZ IT'S STUCK THERE, MAKING ME MORE CONSCIOUS ABOUT DEATH CREEPING INTO MY PANTS ANY HOUR OF 2015. 

THE TOOTH ACHE

TOOTH ACHED TWICE IN 2014. I SUFFERED A WEEK OF FEVERISH NIGHTS BECAUSE OF IT AND HOURS OF EXCRUCIATING PAIN IN THE MOUTH AND HEAD! FORTUNATELY, THE DENTIST AGREED TO HAVE THE TOOTH PULLED ON THE 29th. IM SURE TO LEAVE BEHIND THAT ABHORABLY AMPLIFIED TOOTH ACHE WITH THE OUTGOING YEAR. HASHTAG HOORAY FOR FREE DENTAL TREATMENT. 

YAHOO, I BEAT THE ALARM

FOR SEVERAL MONTHS NOW, IM PROUD TO SAY THAT I LEARNED TO BEAT THE ALARM. I MAY STILL BE TARDY AT WORK, BUT DISTANCE AND TRAFFIC REALLY SUCKS IN THE MORNING IF YOU KNOW WHUT IM TALKIN ABOUT. 

ON LABOUR

I CAN ALSO SAY THAT THE LABORER IN ME DEALT WITH THE LOAD OF WORK WITH DILIGENCE. TRIED TO CHALLENGE MYSELF THROUGH THE APPLICATION OF TIME PRESSURE. IT'S DIFFICULT, COZ IM STILL STUBBORN BUT IM DOIN NICELY :/ YEAH. 

YES, I AM INDEED GRATEFUL FOR HAVING A FAMILY THAT SHELTERS AND FEEDS ME. A BOSS THAT'S SO CONSIDERATE AND GENEROUS. FRIENDS WHO ARE GENEROUS TOO AND RELIABLE. 

BROKE

IM STILL BROKE, YES. NEGATIVE ACTUALLY. SO BROKE THAT INSTEAD OF FORMULATING A NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION, I WORRY ABOUT HOW TO SURVIVE THE FIRST DAY, WEEK OF JANUARY 2015. ADD THE EXPENSES FOR THE UPCOMING TRIP TO SG AND MALAYSIA WITH FRIENDS IN FEBRUARY. 

SERIOUSLY?? AT THIS EXACT MOMENT, AUNTIE THREW COINS ONTO THE ROOM FLOOR. MAKES ME WANNA TRACK EACH COON SHE SCATTERED THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE SO I CAN HAVE FEW BUCKS TO HELP ME GET BY JANUARY FIRST :/ LOL

STRESS

YES, EACH YEAR WE HAVE TO DEAL WITH A DIFFRENT LEVEL OF STRESS. AND THIS TOUGH YEAR CAUSED A PATCH OF HAIRLESS SKIN TO APPEAR SOMEWHERE ON MY HEAD. ALOPECIA , THEY CALL IT. 

WHAT I WOULD LIKE TO DO IN 2015

I WISH TO REGAIN FAITH IN MYSELF
ACQUIRE WISDOM AND
ENJOY REAL PEACE. 

 



Monday, July 14, 2014

ON REDEEMING MY DARK DEEDS

WITH ALL THOSE ABHORABLE THINGS I DID IN LIFE,
TIME HAS BEEN GENEREOUS ENOUGH IN GIVING ME CHANCES TO DO GOOD.

WHEN I LEARNED OF CORRUPTION, THE WORLD PUSHED ME INTO VOLUNTEERISM.
WHEN I LEARNED THE ART OF OF BACKSTABBING, IT TAUGHT ME LOYALTY.
WHEN I LEARNED TO CURSE, IT THEN TAUGHT ME OF CREATIVE WRITING, USING WORDS TO INSPIRE OTHERS AND BRING JOY.
BUT IT FIRST TAUGHT ME OF HUMILITY AND TO SEE BEAUTY IN SIMPLICITY, BEFORE I LEARNED TO MAKE FUN OF OTHERS FLAWS. LOL.

BUT THEN, THERE COMES A TIME WHEN LIFE'S INEQUALITIES BECOME SO EVIDENT IT AFFECTS HOW YOU DEAL WITH LIFE. IT CAUSES YOU TO BREAK ANY OATH YOU SWORN IN. IT CAUSES YOU TO CREATE UNEXPECTED AND UNWANTED DISTANCE.

I AM STILL A NOBODY WHO IS STILL BOUND TO FOLLOW THE LAWS OF HIERARCHY.

EXTERNAL FORCES CONSTANTLY PUSH ME INTO THE EXTREMES.
THAT'S WHY I AM HERE. AND THAT'S WHY I JUST FOUND MYSELF "THERE".

TODAY. I CHOOSE. TO STILL GO. WHERE LIFE TAKES ME.

SURELY, LIFE'S PRESENT DAY KARMA STILL DOES ITS STUFF.
IM STILL HOPEFUL THAT TIME WILL GIVE ME A SUFFICIENT PORTION OF ITSELF
FOR ME TO BE ABLE TO DO GOOD AND BE BETTER.
OH, LAW OF REDEMPTION.

Photo by Maralonics - Deviant Art


Monday, March 31, 2014

DERELICT

I HAD FOUR HOURS OF SLEEP EARLIER THIS MORNING.
NOT ENOUGH TO KEEP ME STAYIN UP THIS LATE.
AND IT WAS NOT FOUR HOURS STRAIGHT.
MY THOUGHTS ARE NOT SO FAR JAMMED UP, 
AND I AM SURE THAT AT WORK, I NEVER COMMITTED A MISTAKE CAUSED BY INSUFFICIENT SLEEP. 
THIS IS DEJA VU TO ME.
FIVE YEARS AGO I THINK I WAS IN THIS EXACT STATE OF SELF.
I LACKED SLEEP. I WORKED. LET THE DAY PASS WITH NO MISTAKE AT ALL.
I WAS CERTAINLY FEELING NOTHING. 
NOT A THING TO MAKE ME FEEL SATISFIED WITH MY STATUS. 
THERE WASN'T A THING CONCRETE ENOUGH TO MAKE ME EAGER 
TO WITNESS THE FUTURE WITH EXCITEMENT. 

NO PURE POSITIVITY. BETTER PUT IT AS POOR POSITIVITY.
OPTIMISM AND CONFIDENCE. ALL THAT NOW. DERELICT. 

Sunday, February 23, 2014

STREETSHOTS

GOT SOME PICS TO SHARE. GRABBED THEM FROM MY FB SUBLIME II ALBUM. 

#STREETSHOT

CONCRETE CORNER. NO STINGY, AWFUL SCENT (YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN) FOR REAL. 


LET THE FOWLS IN THE AIR MOVE FREELY ACROSS THE HORIZON. DO NOT IMPRISON THEM IN CAGES. GIVE THEM HOME INSTEAD. 


FIRST SUNSET OF 2014. AFTER WHAT SEEMED LIKE A LONG DAY, AND AFTER EXHIBITING ITS SCORCHING POWER, THE BLINDING SUN FINALLY CAME TO REST. 


THIS IS PERIMETER FENCE OF AN EDUCATIONAL INSTITUTION. WITH A CONSTRUCTION ON GOING, THE GROUND SEEMED TO HAVE NOT BEEN SPARED A LITTLE CARE; NO TOUCH OF ORDER, JUST DISTURBED SOIL AND A MARRED SPARE TIRE. 


I CANT IDENTIFY THAT TREE WITH AUTUMNLIKE ORANGE LEAVES. I JUST KNOW THAT IT REMAINS STANDING BESIDE SOME YELLOWBELLS AND A CONCRETE OUT OF SEASON CANDY CANE. 


SOMETIMES, ALL YOU NEED TO DO IS HIDE YOUR LIGHT. 

Monday, January 13, 2014

BROKEN

I AM BROKE.
IT JUST FELL ON ME THAT IN TWO YEARS TIME I'LL BE THREE DECADES OLD. THAT I DONT HAVE ANY SAVINGS, BUT CRAP. I AM NOT GROWING UP. I AM ACADEMICALLY BROKE. I AM FINANCIALLY ILLITERATE, THAT I CAN HARDLY FEED MYSELF. AND EARN FOR MY FAMILY.
I EVEN GOT MYSELF A NASTY HABIT WHICH WORSENED, GIVING ME NO PEACE OF MIND, AND IT'S DESTRUCTIVE.

I AM BROKEN. 
THAT MY DREAMS ARE DISTANT. 
AND IM STUCK HERE INCAPABLE OF STEPPIN TOWRDS THEM. 
I AM FAR BEHIND SOME OF MY SUCCESSFUL BATCHMATES, AND ALL I CAN DO IS DAY DREAM THAT IN AN INSTANT, MY LIFE WILL BE BETTER. 

I NEED A BREAK. 
BUT WHENEVER I DESIRE TO PONDER ON THE THINGS I NEED TO DO IN LIFE, MY MIND GETS FILLED WITH OTHER THINGS THAT NEEDED TO GET DONE. 
I AM A LABORER. I AM A SUBORDINATE. I FOLLOW ALMOST EVERYONE'S COMMAND (WELL, SOMETIMES I GET TO CHOOSE WHOM TO FOLLOW LAST). 

BUT I CAN'T BREAKAWAY. 
I AM NOT JUST HOURS BEHIND. 
I AM LEFT BEHIND. 
WITH THE LIABILITIES PILING UP, I CANT MANAGE TO MOVE ON. 
I AM A MESS. 
I AM NOT EXEMPLAR. 
I AM STUCK. 
I AM WAY TOO LOW. 
I AM ERRONEOUS. 
I AM RUBBISH. 

MY FAITH IS PRESENT,
BUT MY PSYCHE DOES SO MANY THINGS AGAINST IT. 


Thursday, January 02, 2014

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2014 ANOTHER YEAR WHICH FOR EVERYONE BRINGS A NEW HOPE TO START THINGS A NEW. FOR SOME THIS TRANSITION IS A MORE DRAMATIC AND MORE RATIONAL TIME TO DO BETTER IN LIFE.

BUT THIS NEW YEAR BEING MERELY A SHIFT IN YEAR AND JUST A DAY AFTER DECEMBER 31, 2013 MAKES ME REALIZE THAT IT'S JUST LIKE A DAY AFTER A DAY.
IT STILL BRINGS WITH IT THE CONSEQUENCES OF YOUR ACTIONS IN 2013. AND THAT WOULD GIVE ONE A TOUGH TIME TO MOVE ON. 

IT'S NEVER AN INSTANT CHANGE.
IT'S NEVER A MAGICAL TURNING POINT THROUGH WHICH ONE CAN EASILY ESCAPE THE HANGUPS CAUSED BY HIS MISDEEDS. 

THOUGH SOME PEOPLE MAY IN A SNAP WEAR A NEW IMAGE AND FLUNT AN ABRUPT CHANGE IN ATTITUDE, WE MUST PUT IN MIND THAT FOR SOME, NO FUNNY RESOLUTIONS CAN BETTER BE PUT IN PLACE OF REALITY. 

REAL TALK: 

YOU CANNOT STRUT A NEW SELF AND MAKE PEOPLE BELIEVE YOU'RE A TOTALLY DIFFERENT CREATURE. 

YOU CANNOT EXPECT PEOPLE TO JUST FORGET THE MISFORTUNE YOU CAUSED THEM, EVEN YOU SAID THE RIGHT WORDS. 

JUST DONT MAKE IT HARD FOR PEOPLE TO DEAL WITH THE NEWER VERSION OF YOURSELF. IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT YOU AND HOW YOU WILL SURVIVE THIS YEAR. IT'S A WHOLE COMMUNITY, A NATION THAT IS EYEING FOR A NICER YEAR AHEAD. KEEP IN MIND THAT EVERYONE WANTS A GOOD, TROUBLE FREE YEAR. 

MAKE IT EASY. TAKE IT EASY.

WISH:

MAY WE ALL POSSESS LOVE & WISDOM AND ENJOY GOOD HEALTH, GOOD FORTUNE & SAFETY THIS 2014.